God put me on this Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will never die.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
Everytime I think I've hit the bottom, someone lends me a shovel.
If at first you don't succeed, give up, no use being a fool.